I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
