what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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