Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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