I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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