wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Randomize
