at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
The Olympian is in my bed
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
