you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
