I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I cut my penus on the lid.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
