I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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