Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives�
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
