There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
