Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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