a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Come see our sink grown plant.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
