how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
