I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
