i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
