I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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