apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
