Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
