the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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