I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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