gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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