Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
