Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize