I feel like I'm in dance class right now
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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