I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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