I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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