I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Randomize
