Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Can I color on your dick again?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
