Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
