i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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