R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
