He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
