Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
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