he shaved USA in his pubs
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
