yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Randomize
