Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
