saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
