you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
