I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
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