I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
