Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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