Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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