How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
you made out with another girl for some wings
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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