2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize
