is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Randomize
