thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize