oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
