the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Randomize
