dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize
